Simple Things To Make You Happy!

Comfort food.

I put this one first for a reason, and that reason is that comfort food is one of the most basic components of being a happy, well-adjusted human. There is no meeting so soul-suckingly boring that a little pizza won’t make you go out of your way to attend it. There is no emotional wound that cannot be at least temporarily patched up with some hot, crispy chicken nuggets and fries with ranch and honey mustard sauce. 

2. Clean sheets.

Man, you just feel gross as shit when you’re on grimy sheets. You feel like a sentient ball of pond scum, temporarily inhabiting a vaguely moist hell that used to resemble your bedroom. It feels like your whole life is falling apart, and the second you change them to those fresh, fluffy, cool-and-warm-at-the-same-time new sheets, everything is back where it should be. You sleep like an angel on a cloud of success. 

3. A breeze.

If there is one state of affairs that reminds us just how completely our overall dispositions depend on our atmospheric surroundings, it is being trapped somewhere that is hot as hell and getting nary a breeze to cool your fevered brow. 

4. A hot shower.

Hot showers, especially when you’re achy or dirty, feel like getting kissed all over your body by a thousand tiny Ryan Goslings. It’s being baptised by the Cleanliness Gods in your own home , and it is an irreplaceable necessity to happiness. 

5. Alone time.

All of the thrilling social activities in the world mean absolutely nothing if you can’t punctuate them with some nice time to just unwind, watch your weird-ass “me time” videos on YouTube, and be a total slob in your underwear.

6. Someone who remembers with you.

You need at least one person to discuss your memories, your experiences, and the person you used to be with. If you don’t have anyone who also remembers certain periods in your life, it can start to feel as though they never happened at all (or that they don’t count). But when you start wandering down memory lane hand-in-hand with someone, it is the emotional equivalent of someone bringing out a surprise ice cream cake and two enormous spoons. You get to just feel all the warm fuzzies, and make each other remember stuff, and giggle over inside jokes. It’s the best.

7. A nice wake-up.

For some of us, including myself, mornings will never be that nice. But if you don’t at least get a few minutes to groggily look at your phone, put something resembling food in your body, and get a little coffee or tea, your day is doomed. When you wake up in an incoherent panic and you have to run out the door wearing the first thing that wasn’t stained with the blood of your enemies, you know that you are just going to feel a little bit like shit all day long. 

8. Good internet.

Having something to do on the internet and watching in agony as each page takes a full 30 seconds to load is amongst the most visceral frustrations we can experience. It’s the kind of thing to make you rip your laptop off its cord and throw it against the wall because you would rather do all of your communication by carrier pigeon from now on. 

9. Purchases that are just for you.

Come on, you need to get something for yourself every now and again. If you don’t occasionally treat yourself to a bag of bulk sweets, or a new asos dress that appears to be made out of clin film and recycled cardboard, or a movie for one in the middle of a Saturday afternoon, what is life about?

10. A comfy sweater.

There is no feeling that makes you feel more safe, more comfortable, more deliciously warm and cosy than pulling a sweater around you, over your palms and up onto your neck, until you are less a human being and more an anthropomorphic ball of wool. It’s like being hugged by your clothes. 

11. At least one person who just gets it.

Whether it’s the friend who doesn’t need any social issues explained to them (and who will never make horribly oppressive jokes because they don’t believe in being “PC”), or the person who is just as obsessed with that one book/show/movie/band as you are and does not matter one bit if you want to talk about it for an entire five-hour hangout session, we all need the person who “gets it.” You don’t need a group of them, you just need the one, and your sanity will be intact. Without them, you will begin to slowly question whether or not your entire reality is a figment of your imagination. Your happiness is always reinforced by their existence.

 

What keeps you happy?

Reasons Not To Live With Your Best Friends

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Living with your best gal pals always seems like a freakin’ fantastic idea.

I remember signing my first lease and daydreaming about my girlfriends and I setting up our place, cooking great meals, drinking way too much wine and having pillow fights for our own damn good. Looking back on these daydreams, I seemed to have forgotten that we all had different schedules, different goals and pillow fights were not on the cards. 

In the end, even though the IDEA of living with great friends may seem like the right choice, think long and hard about the friendships that are worth keeping.

 

Your friends may come with emotional baggage

 The ability to be not only a friend, but a good friend, is important to sustain a meaningful friendship. If you or your roommates have some sort of problem that requires support from close friends, living with someone who needs that support can hinder relationships. Offering constant advice and being someone’s emotional crutch can be exhausting, especially when your first priority is taking care of yourself. Offering advice and support from a distance can be more helpful and encourage the person to problem solve on their own. This means that you can be a good friend and at the same time, be a useful source of advice without feeling overwhelmed.

Someone likes alcohol a little too much

We all party hard at Uni (well most) Sure that’s fun on the weekends or once and awhile, but there always seems to be a booze-hound in the house. Ok, these gatherings can be pretty fun, but how often do you really want to deal with the dirty aftermath of these events? The stench of booze-laden breath in class the next morning is only socially acceptable so many times. Make sure your gal pals have similar attitudes around drinking/partying or make sure you have strong enough willpower to do what you need to. This mindset comes with the complimentary title of house party-pooper.

They don’t have the same vengeful attitude as you do when it comes to a dirty kitchen (or any house common area)

So many of my past roommate conflicts have come from dirty common areas. Take, for example, the kitchen and dirty dishes. Who used what mug or who left their shit on the stove doesn’t really matter if, in the end, the dishes get cleaned. Just do your dishes when you’re finished using them (instead of leaving them to crust over and harbor bacteria in the sink). Doesn’t this seem like simple, common sense knowledge? I think so, too.

*Note: If you know, for a fact, that somebody is not cleaning their dishware (and you are looking to stir the pot hehe!) make a trail of dirty dishes from the sink to their bedroom. I cannot speak from experience but I hear this tactic is quite effective.

You have the same schedules

Hanging out with good friends is great, but hanging out with good friends in class, during your free time, during your meal times, and right before bed can be tolerable at most. Just like unlimited drunk pizza, your friends can be too much of a good thing. Take the personal time you need if your roommates become overwhelming…or just live with people who have different interests and never wanted to hang out with you in the first place.

Somebody has a pet

Any household with a pet can cause roommate conflict. If the owner is not taking full responsibility of their animal, I can guarantee somebody is not going to be happy. If you’re already having issues with your live-in friends, don’t drag a poor dog or cat into the mix. Animals can sense emotion from the people around them. Who wants a stressed out pooch/kitty/ferret/chinchilla/etc.? Not me.

They have significant others

This is a big one. You may not think that your roommates significant others should affect your feelings towards your roommate. Believe me, they will. Significant others tend to linger around the house and stay just a tiny bit over their welcome. This, of course, is brushed under the rug for a bit because it seems temporary. But, when this significant other starts using the cable/dishes/food/electricity/internet/washer/dryer and isn’t paying a penny, there’s a definite problem. It is obnoxious, it is impolite, and you will end up hating your roommate when she gets defensive after you bring up the obvious problems with her boyfriend hanging around 24/7. Plus, you have to deal with her significant other eating the majority of your snack food and leaving the toilet seat up (not cool).

 

You and your friends ‘split groceries’

Since you all get along so well anyways (I mean you’re such great friends), why not split groceries to make everything a bit easier? This never, ever works. Either someone’s going to get drunk and eat too many pizza slices or there will be some type of feud over who ate the last slice of bread. To outsiders, these examples seem minimal and harmless, but harboring ill will towards a roommate who you think took more than their fair share can be unhealthy and catty. Skip the drama and buy your own grub.

You are the responsible one who pays all the bills

Being in charge of monthly payments can be a bitch. Everyone is poor in Uni anyways and nobody wants the task of haggling money out of each roommate when a payment is looming. It’s harder to press people you like for money versus someone you could care less about. You never want bill paying to become anything more than a mere transaction. I would avoid being in charge of this task (it really sucks).

One final piece of advice: Do NOT use a dry-erase board for communication purposes. There is nothing more obnoxious than passive-aggressiveness. Just voice your opinion whenever there is an issue (especially if it effects more than just you). Don’t write it with an excessive amount of exclamation points or evil emoticons. This can make people feel slighted and crappy. 

 

Have you had better luck with friends?

The 5 Types Of Friend to Avoid Being

As you get older you can pick and choose friends, but when you look at your friendship group there is always 'positions' everyone has roles, but what role do you play? I tend to be cast as the joker, the party animal, and the one you know will be awake at 4am so it's fine to call. But there are some roles you don't want to have, and more so why exactly are you friends with them? I have therefore narrowed it down to five!

The Competitive One

Lets be serious; is there anything worse? They disguise themselves as friends when really in their mind everything is one big contest that they must, MUST win. In school it’s better grades, more friends, the hot boyfriend. These people will grow up to become friends that NEED to have a bigger house than you, get paid more money, etc. etc. etc.  No friendship based on competition is ever a true friendship. Ideally people should revel in their friends successes not be plotting ways to achieve more than them. 

 The One in the Best Relationship 

Maybe it is just because I was in a relatinoship for so so long, I just don’t see the dire need to display things on the regular. If you are in a relationship it goes without saying that now and again he might say something nice to you, or he may even buy you flowers. Why are women always so awestruck by these things that they need to run and tell the world? I just find it odd. When your man builds you a castle with his bare hands that’s when I’d like to see 12 pictures of it.

 The Trouble Maker 

Your close friends should know what makes you happy and what is only going to make you upset and they act accordingly· Trouble makers will say things such as 'did you see the way she looked at you' or 'Pretty sure that passive aggressive facebook status was about you' they do it under the guise of a good friend. Maybe they truly do think they are helping but if what they say most of the time is just stirring the pot (and stirring up your crazy) try not to take it too seriously.

  The ME, ME, ME. 

Conversations in ideal essence should be a mixture of “I” statements and “you” statements. Where is the fun in a conversation if the entirety of it you are listening to someone talk about themselves? It's the one you know where you say 'Oh god I have had a terrible day' and something worse has ALWAYS happened to them. Sometimes you really do just have to listen to people and thats fine, but don't forget that really the fact you spilt coffee on your dress, really isn't up there with someone who just wrote off their car. 

 The Judgemental One

Sometimes we all do silly things, we kiss 10 guys in a night even though we are over 30, we get so drunk we sleep in a dog basket – we all do these crazy behaviours. These things happen and it would be nice is your friends would just silently love you for the moderately insane person you might well be. You didn't judge them for the time they dated the married man, so why should they judge you now? We all question and overanalyze our choices enough as it is without friends guilt tripping us or making us second guess things. 

What kind of friend do you think play in your friendship group? 

That Awkward Moment When...

How often do you get a phone call from a friend that starts: 'guess what happened to me today?'
Here are a selection of a few of my favourites!

That awkward moment when...

... someone asks for your email address, and you still use the one you made aged 8

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... you have to sneak out of someone's house the morning after a one-night stand

(This was sent to me by a friend, and I did ask his permission to use it in the blog!)

... you're stuck walking behind someone who walks at a snail's pace

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... you wave at someone who's waving to the person behind you

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... your dad tells a really embarrassing story about you in front of your crush

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... you send a really ugly snapchat to the wrong person

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...you scroll back to 2007 on Facebook and realise how much of a loser you were

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... you have a coughing/sneezing/hiccuping fit in the middle of an exam

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... you're texting while walking and walk into a lamppost (I have done this SO many times)

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... you fall over in heels on the way to a casting

I feel so bad for this girl! #modelproblems or what?!

... you accidentally like someone's profile picture from 6 years ago

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... you realise you're third wheeling

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Please let me know if you have anymore awkward moments! I'd love to hear them!

Don’t forget to email me on marieke@wonderlandclothing.com, or you can follow me on Instagram, Twitter or Tumblr!

How do you know when a friendship is over?

 Source Unkown

  The other day someone I am working with on a collaboration was telling me about their best friend. I couldnt help but feel that (although I had only heard one side) the friendship to me just didn't sound like it was working out. Friendships are relationships that should be cherished, but they need to be balanced. If you constantly worry that your friend is mad at you, that your friend just seems to come to you when shit if hitting the fan, most importantly that a particular friendship is causing you more harm than good, well then it might be time to re-evaluatete it.

The older I have gotton, the more I value my friendships. I no longer want the most friends, or the fullest phonebook, I like to have people that I trust, value, and respect and want to spend time with, and vice versa! 

  So how do you know when a friendship isn't working? What are the signs? 

Why your friends shouldn't and might not always agree with you (however much we wish they would!) they and you should always keep an open mind about what you are sharing with them. We should always be able to put our point of view aisde and look at things from other peoples perspective, and if we cant, or people don’t? Well that is not a healthy relationship.

 Source Unknown

 Saying that not every conversation with your friends needs to be deep and meaningful. But strong, lasting friendships are built on more than just shopping, grabbing coffee, or getting drunk. If your friend is not interested in trying to build on these relationships, or are you, it is not saying that it is a bad friendship, but it isn't a deep one. If you only do these things with your 'close' friends and that friendship doesn't go deeper, then how close are you really? 

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You ever had that friend that you know isn't going to want to go to your favourite dinner spot? Know that they will criticse your choice of attire? But you even think of even critcising them? Well you know the backlash that will ensue? That's not friendship, and personally? talk it out and explain how you feel or walk away. It is the same if your friend is only interested in what she/he gets out of your relationship. If you find that 9/10th's of the conversation are taken up by her, and her problems then it's not a mutual friendship, you're acting more as a counsellor.

If you find yourself in a friendship that's causing you more stress than enjoyment, you may want to end the relationship. Most friendships don't totally have to end you just have to reevaulate where they are on the friendship spectrum. 

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So you feel in friendship limbo what can you do to make it or break it?

You need to decide if the problems in this friendship, like the ones discussed are more than just a blip in your well being. If they are becoming detrimental to your life, growth and health? Well it's time to take a step away. If you're not sure about what to do or whether you are in the right or wrong then it's best to ask someone else who is unbiased. Asking someone who is not in the friendship, can give you the clarity you need, but make sure you are being honest also. If you come to the conclusion that the friendship is over, then move on.

Friendships may have their ups and downs, but they are supposed to be positive aspects of our lives. If you are coming away feeling more negative than positive from the relationship then it may be time to let it go.